10. My brother switched the shampoo and Zonrox as an April Fools joke.
9. I’m channeling my inner Nicole Julian, thank you.
8. So that I can finally stop pretending that I’m smart.
7. I ran into Tyra at the mall and she chased me with a dye brush and a hair color bowl.
6. Too much Poker Face turned my hair into Gaga-White.
5. I’m auditioning for that ABS-CBN Twilight rip-off.
4. I finally decided to buy a chihuahua and go to law school. In that order.
3. Brangelina might adopt me.
2. I asked a Magic 8 Ball.
1. So that I can finally pose all douchebaggy and post it on Facebook.